Providence Spirituality

The sacrament of doubt

Last Updated 1/6/2010 9:18:54 AM


By: Connie McCammon

“The sacrament of doubt” appeared in the winter 2010 issue of HOPE. We hope that after reading this article you will want to share how doubt has played a role in your faith development on our comments page.

By Brother Barry Donaghue, cfc

I was excited to read, as recently as Oct. 30, 2009, that we are now able to estimate the distance from Earth of a huge gamma ray burst, previously detected by NASA’s Swift satellite. Since light coming from such an extraordinary distance is stretched because the universe is expanding, the greater the stretch the more distant the object. This stretching is called redshift and can be seen and measured. The previous most distant object was a galaxy and had a redshift of 6.96. This gamma-ray burst had a redshift of 8.2, which puts it at 13.1 billion years ago, the furthest we have ever seen, a “mere” 630 million years after the original “flaring forth.” That’s amazing!

At that time the universe was nine times smaller than it is now.

The immensity, beauty and timing of the movement of creation continue to be “Oh, my God” moments for me as I become more and more aware of the power, intelligence and sheer life-force of our God and the amazing presence and relationship of the same God in our lives. Just as the universe is expanding, so the life and example of Jesus calls us to expand our understanding of and our relationship with God. We have the deposit of faith, but we must also continue to interact with it, because it is of God and never-ending.

This new science certainly challenges the old stories of creation that I was brought up on, although I can still value them. The Bible stories of creation were addressed to people at a particular time in history with their worldview and the religious questions that emerged from that worldview and their notions about God. In this context the stories conveyed both hope and truth for them. But they cannot and should not be taught as literal fact today.

Not surprisingly, all this has brought up for me the role of doubt in developing my faith. I was somewhat surprised when I realized that doubt was not a challenge to my faith, but rather called me to consider far more deeply what I believe and why. I realized that doubt is not the opposite of faith; certainty has that role. These new discoveries, although challenging my certainties, have freed my faith to lead me into a deeper relationship with God. Certainty is comfortable, but if I am comfortable I will be very reluctant to move. In terms of faith development I need a “burr under my saddle” and doubt supplies that. Not comfortable, but necessary. Doubt has helped me realize more of what was meant by God’s words in Isaiah 55:9: “As the heavens are higher than the Earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”

We could also turn to the words of St. Thomas Aquinas: “A mistake in our understanding of creation will necessarily cause a mistake in our understanding of God.” Or those of St. Paul in Romans 1:20: “Ever since God created the world, God’s everlasting power and deity — however invisible — have been there for the mind to see in the things God has made.” Again, in Romans 8:22 Paul says: “We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time.”

These great intuitive saints could not see what we can see with modern technology, but they sensed that God was about more than we could think or imagine. Paul, for instance, had to doubt the power of the Law, all that he had been brought up to believe as sacred, and that came hard. So, if all this stuff about the universe knocks us off our horses, isn’t that wonderful? Could it be that the age of the horse is past?

Let me use an example from my years in Tasmania, Australia’s island state. The southwest of the state is dense temperate rain forest, absolutely trackless, but a wonderful place to hike amongst 150 tall mountains, button grass plains and a multitude of lakes with reflections you wouldn’t believe; an extraordinary eco-system that has been developing for more than 65 million years.

However, one does get lost; in fact getting lost is just about mandatory. But we have maps and a compass and even aerial photographs. So we get back our bearings from two or preferably three mountains we recognize from the contours on the map and find out where we really are. Then we compare it with the aerial map terrain and continue on our course, until we start to doubt our progress again. As Saint Mother Theodore Guerin said, “Grope along slowly.” We are in the arms of God.

I use this example of “getting lost” as a metaphor for spiritual direction, although the spiritual director is going to be a lot more relational and listening than a bunch of maps and compasses.

In 1840, Sister St. Theodore, sick and physically damaged, was asked to cross a dangerous ocean and go into the wilderness. We know from the writings of the second general superior, Mother Cecilia Bailly, that by the time she was walking down the slope, after the wagon stopped in the forest at Saint Mary-of-the-Woods, Sister St. Theodore was so full of doubt she was almost despairing. However, she persevered, and in the little log cabin chapel she saw the consecrated host and realized that God was here waiting for her. She had never been out of God’s view. Her doubt led to something like the explosion of the universe in her much smaller psyche. When she stepped out of that sorry little building, in a sense, all that the Sisters of Providence have accomplished in God’s name over 170 years exploded out of her, continuing to spread ever since. Such a force for good! And Sister St. Theodore became Saint Mother Theodore.

Let us go out across our symbolic seas and venture into our dark forests and deep caves. Let us take our good, strong, loving hearts with us and walk with God into the wilderness. Never be afraid to doubt. Nothing great has ever been achieved without it.

I had grasped God’s garment in the void
but my hand slipped
on the rich silk of it.
The “everlasting arms” my sister loved to remember must have upheld my leaden weight
from falling, even so,
for though I claw at empty air and feel
nothing, no embrace,
I have not plummeted.
“Suspended,” Denise Levertov

Director of Providence Center at Saint Mary-of-the-Woods, Ind., Brother Barry Donaghue is an Australian Christian Brother. He is a teacher and retreat director.

 

The sacrament of doubt

Last Updated 1/6/2010 9:18:54 AM


By: Connie McCammon

“The sacrament of doubt” appeared in the winter 2010 issue of HOPE. We hope that after reading this article you will want to share how doubt has played a role in your faith development on our comments page.

By Brother Barry Donaghue, cfc

I was excited to read, as recently as Oct. 30, 2009, that we are now able to estimate the distance from Earth of a huge gamma ray burst, previously detected by NASA’s Swift satellite. Since light coming from such an extraordinary distance is stretched because the universe is expanding, the greater the stretch the more distant the object. This stretching is called redshift and can be seen and measured. The previous most distant object was a galaxy and had a redshift of 6.96. This gamma-ray burst had a redshift of 8.2, which puts it at 13.1 billion years ago, the furthest we have ever seen, a “mere” 630 million years after the original “flaring forth.” That’s amazing!

At that time the universe was nine times smaller than it is now.

The immensity, beauty and timing of the movement of creation continue to be “Oh, my God” moments for me as I become more and more aware of the power, intelligence and sheer life-force of our God and the amazing presence and relationship of the same God in our lives. Just as the universe is expanding, so the life and example of Jesus calls us to expand our understanding of and our relationship with God. We have the deposit of faith, but we must also continue to interact with it, because it is of God and never-ending.

This new science certainly challenges the old stories of creation that I was brought up on, although I can still value them. The Bible stories of creation were addressed to people at a particular time in history with their worldview and the religious questions that emerged from that worldview and their notions about God. In this context the stories conveyed both hope and truth for them. But they cannot and should not be taught as literal fact today.

Not surprisingly, all this has brought up for me the role of doubt in developing my faith. I was somewhat surprised when I realized that doubt was not a challenge to my faith, but rather called me to consider far more deeply what I believe and why. I realized that doubt is not the opposite of faith; certainty has that role. These new discoveries, although challenging my certainties, have freed my faith to lead me into a deeper relationship with God. Certainty is comfortable, but if I am comfortable I will be very reluctant to move. In terms of faith development I need a “burr under my saddle” and doubt supplies that. Not comfortable, but necessary. Doubt has helped me realize more of what was meant by God’s words in Isaiah 55:9: “As the heavens are higher than the Earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”

We could also turn to the words of St. Thomas Aquinas: “A mistake in our understanding of creation will necessarily cause a mistake in our understanding of God.” Or those of St. Paul in Romans 1:20: “Ever since God created the world, God’s everlasting power and deity — however invisible — have been there for the mind to see in the things God has made.” Again, in Romans 8:22 Paul says: “We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time.”

These great intuitive saints could not see what we can see with modern technology, but they sensed that God was about more than we could think or imagine. Paul, for instance, had to doubt the power of the Law, all that he had been brought up to believe as sacred, and that came hard. So, if all this stuff about the universe knocks us off our horses, isn’t that wonderful? Could it be that the age of the horse is past?

Let me use an example from my years in Tasmania, Australia’s island state. The southwest of the state is dense temperate rain forest, absolutely trackless, but a wonderful place to hike amongst 150 tall mountains, button grass plains and a multitude of lakes with reflections you wouldn’t believe; an extraordinary eco-system that has been developing for more than 65 million years.

However, one does get lost; in fact getting lost is just about mandatory. But we have maps and a compass and even aerial photographs. So we get back our bearings from two or preferably three mountains we recognize from the contours on the map and find out where we really are. Then we compare it with the aerial map terrain and continue on our course, until we start to doubt our progress again. As Saint Mother Theodore Guerin said, “Grope along slowly.” We are in the arms of God.

I use this example of “getting lost” as a metaphor for spiritual direction, although the spiritual director is going to be a lot more relational and listening than a bunch of maps and compasses.

In 1840, Sister St. Theodore, sick and physically damaged, was asked to cross a dangerous ocean and go into the wilderness. We know from the writings of the second general superior, Mother Cecilia Bailly, that by the time she was walking down the slope, after the wagon stopped in the forest at Saint Mary-of-the-Woods, Sister St. Theodore was so full of doubt she was almost despairing. However, she persevered, and in the little log cabin chapel she saw the consecrated host and realized that God was here waiting for her. She had never been out of God’s view. Her doubt led to something like the explosion of the universe in her much smaller psyche. When she stepped out of that sorry little building, in a sense, all that the Sisters of Providence have accomplished in God’s name over 170 years exploded out of her, continuing to spread ever since. Such a force for good! And Sister St. Theodore became Saint Mother Theodore.

Let us go out across our symbolic seas and venture into our dark forests and deep caves. Let us take our good, strong, loving hearts with us and walk with God into the wilderness. Never be afraid to doubt. Nothing great has ever been achieved without it.

I had grasped God’s garment in the void
but my hand slipped
on the rich silk of it.
The “everlasting arms” my sister loved to remember must have upheld my leaden weight
from falling, even so,
for though I claw at empty air and feel
nothing, no embrace,
I have not plummeted.
“Suspended,” Denise Levertov

Director of Providence Center at Saint Mary-of-the-Woods, Ind., Brother Barry Donaghue is an Australian Christian Brother. He is a teacher and retreat director.

 

The sacrament of doubt

Last Updated 1/6/2010 9:18:54 AM


By: Connie McCammon

“The sacrament of doubt” appeared in the winter 2010 issue of HOPE. We hope that after reading this article you will want to share how doubt has played a role in your faith development on our comments page.

By Brother Barry Donaghue, cfc

I was excited to read, as recently as Oct. 30, 2009, that we are now able to estimate the distance from Earth of a huge gamma ray burst, previously detected by NASA’s Swift satellite. Since light coming from such an extraordinary distance is stretched because the universe is expanding, the greater the stretch the more distant the object. This stretching is called redshift and can be seen and measured. The previous most distant object was a galaxy and had a redshift of 6.96. This gamma-ray burst had a redshift of 8.2, which puts it at 13.1 billion years ago, the furthest we have ever seen, a “mere” 630 million years after the original “flaring forth.” That’s amazing!

At that time the universe was nine times smaller than it is now.

The immensity, beauty and timing of the movement of creation continue to be “Oh, my God” moments for me as I become more and more aware of the power, intelligence and sheer life-force of our God and the amazing presence and relationship of the same God in our lives. Just as the universe is expanding, so the life and example of Jesus calls us to expand our understanding of and our relationship with God. We have the deposit of faith, but we must also continue to interact with it, because it is of God and never-ending.

This new science certainly challenges the old stories of creation that I was brought up on, although I can still value them. The Bible stories of creation were addressed to people at a particular time in history with their worldview and the religious questions that emerged from that worldview and their notions about God. In this context the stories conveyed both hope and truth for them. But they cannot and should not be taught as literal fact today.

Not surprisingly, all this has brought up for me the role of doubt in developing my faith. I was somewhat surprised when I realized that doubt was not a challenge to my faith, but rather called me to consider far more deeply what I believe and why. I realized that doubt is not the opposite of faith; certainty has that role. These new discoveries, although challenging my certainties, have freed my faith to lead me into a deeper relationship with God. Certainty is comfortable, but if I am comfortable I will be very reluctant to move. In terms of faith development I need a “burr under my saddle” and doubt supplies that. Not comfortable, but necessary. Doubt has helped me realize more of what was meant by God’s words in Isaiah 55:9: “As the heavens are higher than the Earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”

We could also turn to the words of St. Thomas Aquinas: “A mistake in our understanding of creation will necessarily cause a mistake in our understanding of God.” Or those of St. Paul in Romans 1:20: “Ever since God created the world, God’s everlasting power and deity — however invisible — have been there for the mind to see in the things God has made.” Again, in Romans 8:22 Paul says: “We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time.”

These great intuitive saints could not see what we can see with modern technology, but they sensed that God was about more than we could think or imagine. Paul, for instance, had to doubt the power of the Law, all that he had been brought up to believe as sacred, and that came hard. So, if all this stuff about the universe knocks us off our horses, isn’t that wonderful? Could it be that the age of the horse is past?

Let me use an example from my years in Tasmania, Australia’s island state. The southwest of the state is dense temperate rain forest, absolutely trackless, but a wonderful place to hike amongst 150 tall mountains, button grass plains and a multitude of lakes with reflections you wouldn’t believe; an extraordinary eco-system that has been developing for more than 65 million years.

However, one does get lost; in fact getting lost is just about mandatory. But we have maps and a compass and even aerial photographs. So we get back our bearings from two or preferably three mountains we recognize from the contours on the map and find out where we really are. Then we compare it with the aerial map terrain and continue on our course, until we start to doubt our progress again. As Saint Mother Theodore Guerin said, “Grope along slowly.” We are in the arms of God.

I use this example of “getting lost” as a metaphor for spiritual direction, although the spiritual director is going to be a lot more relational and listening than a bunch of maps and compasses.

In 1840, Sister St. Theodore, sick and physically damaged, was asked to cross a dangerous ocean and go into the wilderness. We know from the writings of the second general superior, Mother Cecilia Bailly, that by the time she was walking down the slope, after the wagon stopped in the forest at Saint Mary-of-the-Woods, Sister St. Theodore was so full of doubt she was almost despairing. However, she persevered, and in the little log cabin chapel she saw the consecrated host and realized that God was here waiting for her. She had never been out of God’s view. Her doubt led to something like the explosion of the universe in her much smaller psyche. When she stepped out of that sorry little building, in a sense, all that the Sisters of Providence have accomplished in God’s name over 170 years exploded out of her, continuing to spread ever since. Such a force for good! And Sister St. Theodore became Saint Mother Theodore.

Let us go out across our symbolic seas and venture into our dark forests and deep caves. Let us take our good, strong, loving hearts with us and walk with God into the wilderness. Never be afraid to doubt. Nothing great has ever been achieved without it.

I had grasped God’s garment in the void
but my hand slipped
on the rich silk of it.
The “everlasting arms” my sister loved to remember must have upheld my leaden weight
from falling, even so,
for though I claw at empty air and feel
nothing, no embrace,
I have not plummeted.
“Suspended,” Denise Levertov

Director of Providence Center at Saint Mary-of-the-Woods, Ind., Brother Barry Donaghue is an Australian Christian Brother. He is a teacher and retreat director.

 
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